The Mystery of Bondage, shameful or empowering, pleasure or suffering

When looked through the lens of fear, violence, desire or judgement, a photograph like this might trigger various negative emotions and prejudices associated with objectification, torment, suppression etc. When looked with an open mind and compassion, love and trust, we might see a person who acknowledges her pain and suffering, she brings her awareness to where it hurts the most, she is fully in the present moment, she feels the suffocating pressure imposed by our own judgements and conditioning, by our compliance with the societal norms and by our disconnection from the body and its need for love, care and attention. She trusts that it's not the loving partner that created that inner suffering, but he is the one to bring her awareness to it with gentle touch and loving look and he is here to help her liberate herself from that shame and the fear of suffering and bring her awareness back into her body and into the present moment.

Regardless of the shy look on the innocent young woman's face, she is able to accept and reveal her beautiful, given by the nature body being bound by the ropes of judgement, shame, unacceptance of sexuality, censorship and public opinions. The intricate pattern of the red shibari rope emphasizes her gentle curves, bringing awareness to delicate areas of her body and creating a psychological contrast between the softness of her skin and the tightness of the rope. She is willingly sharing her beauty, fragility and shame with everyone able to see her earnestness, humility and purity without judgments and preconceptions. She is fully in the moment and everyone who sees the image experiences that moment of awe and silence, when all the habitual conditioned thinking stops for a second, before the mind catches up and replaces the present moment with a set of judgments and prefabricated views.

Even though it might appear as suffering, she knows that when the suffering is accepted, it ends. When the ropes are removed, she'll enjoy the tranquility of freedom and will delight in her own inner strength, tolerance, self acceptance and willpower. After that fleeting moment, her life and the lives of those who see, will go back to 'normal' repetitive daily routine, chores, work, social life, which inevitably makes us suppress our inner selves and place innumerable restrictions on our self expression. Unwilling to accept suffering in being judged or unaccepted, we carry our own nature deep within, carefully hidden from the looks of others and from our own minds, creating a dark impenetrable shadow that will never see the light of acceptance.

So which is the suffering, the former or the latter? Both? Neither?

She is holding a gentle pink rose in her hands, a symbol of pure, unconditional love. Just like the mother Earth she will take all the suffering and joy, darkness and light, and nourish the humanity with all of her virtues, love and mysterious beauty. Just like the Earth, she will carry the light of the sun and the moon and the darkness of the night on her infinite journey, amazing the people by her natural purity. Scorching rays of the sun will warm her, thick clouds will cool her down, rains showers will wash her, she'll get refreshed by the crispy snow, the wind will purify her and make her sing, the lightning storm will imbue her with celestial power, the dense fog will bring her tranquility. She'll take it all, all the while being serene and enlightened, nourishing those in need of her boundless gifts, beauty, compassion and wisdom.

From a beautiful book 'THE POWER OF NOW' by Eckhart Tolle:

"A victim identity is the belief that the past is more powerful than the present, which is the opposite of the truth. It is the belief that other people and what they did to you are responsible for who you are now, for your emotional pain or your inability to be your true self. The truth is that the only power there is is contained within this moment: It is the power of
your presence. Once you know that, you also realize that you are responsible for your inner space now — nobody else is — and that the past cannot prevail against the power of the Now.

So identification prevents you from dealing with the pain-body. Some women who are already conscious enough to have relinquished their victim identity on the personal level are still holding on to a collective victim identity: “what men did to women.” They are right — and they are also wrong. They are right inasmuch as the collective female painbody is in large part due to male violence inflicted on women and repression of the female principle throughout the planet over millennia. They are wrong if they derive a sense of self from this fact and thereby keep themselves imprisoned in a collective victim identity. If a woman is still holding on to anger, resentment, or condemnation, she is holding on to her pain-body. This may give her a comforting sense of identity, of solidarity with other women, but it is keeping her in bondage to the past and blocking full access to her essence and true power. If women exclude themselves from men, that fosters a sense of separation and therefore a strengthening of the ego. And the stronger the ego, the more distant you are from your true nature.

So do not use the pain-body to give you an identity. Use it for enlightenment instead. Transmute it into consciousness."

But in the end, bondage is just a tool, one out of many, that can bring our awareness to suffering in our body, mind and soul. Specifically to suffering from suppressed sexuality, shame, fear of judgment or non-acceptance by the society. Once we learn to realize and accept this suffering, the tool is no longer needed, and we are ready to face the real suffering we come into contact with in our daily lives and go through it gracefully, with our hearts open, without fear or reservation.

As with any other practice of self-empowerment, bondage is not universal and is only beneficial to those having a need to go through it, having a calling from the shadow part of ourselves asking to bring awareness to it in this particular way. There needs to be an atmosphere of trust and open communication between the model and the practitioner, as the bondage itself should not cause any significant physical discomfort but only act as a trick for the mind. The awareness and a consequent release come from the struggle between the rational mind and the shadow part of our consciousness ending in the acceptance of our disregarded shadow-self associated with nudity and sexuality. At this point, it's very important for the practitioners and for the viewers, not to give rise and succumb to basic sexual desires, but to see the unfolding sensual energy in a detached, abstract, even spiritual way. It's a skill of the practitioner not to cause any real suffering and to be fully relaxed, mindful and sensitive to the model's situation, helping her to go through the process and overcome any mental restraints and anxieties associated with it. And it's the willpower and tranquil mindfulness of the model that will allow her to go through the process without losing herself to anxiety, mistrust or fear and ending the session only after completely acknowledging, accepting and overcoming the suffering and the negative emotions associated with it.

In the end, there is only one thing matters, two loving partners who are able to give each other what they need and when they need it without judgement and reservation. Being able to feel and respect each other and to free each other from the suffocating ties of human conditioning, suppression of human expression, mindless indulgences, routine behavioral patterns and disconnection from the present, from our bodies and from each other.


Feel free to look through our photo collections and find that perfect art piece that resonates with you and gives you emotional or spiritual liberation. You can contact us with any custom wall art orders catered directly to your needs. If you have a story to share or have feedback for us, we look forward to your comments.

Alex Maxim